Shut up amid the cackle.

Thoughts about thoughts

I think. Sometimes I think so much that I wonder how my tiny brain manages to hold all those fibre glass fragments of activity together. I just think. My brain manages my respiration, my digestion, my movements and my complete balance in addition to my thoughts. Overworked. Hard pressed for space. So much to manage in one space. That is why there are no blanks in my brain. It is fully wired. Completely active. No inactivity. I think about thought. I think about the instrument of my thought. I think about why I am thinking. I am in circles forever, because thoughts always run in circles. I don't know why but that is how it is. I guess thoughts really like circles. I will remember to think about why next time.

However, I am not alone. The Universe is teeming with thinkers. All of them. Everyone has their own, recreational thought world. Ok, sometimes not recreational. The lady scratching her head in the train is probably thinking about dandruff and why her head is itching. Or there is a deeper process at work involving her evening cooking. The men who fight on the train are thinking about the show-down they had with their bosses. The woman who screeches because another woman stepped on her toes is thinking about how everyone steps on her toes to get ahead. Or maybe how she steps on everyone's toes to get ahead. The child leaning out of the window is thinking about when he will grow up. The sandwich vendor is thinking about when his street cart will expand to a shop. The person who is talking to another person on the road is thinking about how annoyed he is that he was stopped on his way home to answer a mundane question....so on and so forth.

Everyone thinks. Everyone thinks in similarities, in opposites. Everyone thinks in reasons. Some look for causes, some look for effects. Some think in retrospect, some introspect. There are a few who think in the future. Some wonder where they were at this time, last year, some wonder where they will be this time, next year. But all the same, everyone is constantly thinking. Daily incidents give constant fuel to this thought process, and we go on. Like the only aim to life is thought. The motor never slows. We think when we sleep, we think when we are semi conscious and we think when we are alert. At least, we think that we are thinking. Thought takes up a majority of your day, and ultimately your life.

Some of these thoughts are illuminating, some of these thoughts are hazy, some of these thoughts are confusing, some of these thoughts are disturbing. Some thoughts are awash in the sunlight of nostalgia, yet some in the dark clouds of the future...some of them have rainbow hues and yet others, nothing but a pure, colourless consistency of water. Some thoughts are liquid, and they flow out leaving a languid richness inside. Some are solid and refuse to budge. Some are frightening in their opacity and some, beautiful in their transcendescence.

Someday, when the dried leaves of winter look up at you from the pavement, and you wonder where life has gone, thoughts will be your companions. They will be the rainbows and then, you will have your world again. You will think, and you will be awakened in the fact that you think. Your world will exist again, and the leaves shall no longer look at you.

posted by Anupama. @ 12:06 pm